4 Simple Ways to Stay Connected in Your Adult Friendships
⏱️ Estimated reading time: 5 minutes
TL;DR: Maintaining friendships as an adult can seem challenging, but these simple tips make it much easier to stay connected to the people you care about the most.
The Importance of Staying Connected with Friends
You’ve probably heard about the epidemic of loneliness these days. So many of us are craving connection, even when we’re surrounded by people. I’ve written before about why that is and how to start building connections. But today, I want to focus on something just as important: the friendships you already have.
📖 If you’d like to read more, add this blog post to your reading list 👉The Epidemic of Loneliness
Meet Dr. Jenny White
Before we get into it, I’m Dr. Jenny White, a licensed clinical psychologist who helps high-achievers, people-pleasers, and busy professionals find more balance and connection in their lives through online therapy. I specialize in anxiety, relationship challenges, and workplace stress to help you build meaningful relationships that feel fulfilling, not draining.
👉You can view my services here.
DISCLAIMER: I am a licensed clinical psychologist, and the information provided here is for general informational and educational purposes only. While I aim to share helpful and thoughtful content, reading this blog does not establish or imply a therapist-client relationship between us.
If you are experiencing a mental health crisis, please seek immediate help from a licensed professional or contact emergency services in your area. This blog should not be a substitute for professional mental health care or personalized guidance.
For personalized support or therapy services, please reach out directly to a licensed mental health provider in your area.
Table of Contents
- The Importance of Staying Connected with Friends
- Meet Dr. Jenny White
- How to Stay Connected With Friends You Already Have
- Why Adult Friendships Matter More Than You Think
- Social Connection and Happiness in Adulthood
- Adult Friendship Advice From “Big Friendship”
- Creating Stronger Connections Takes Effort
- Prioritizing Relationships When Life Gets Busy
- Practical Ways to Strengthen Your Adult Social Life
- 1. Schedule time on the calendar
- 2. Utilize small pockets of time
- 3. Experiment with technology
- 4. Try an organized activity
- When Adult Friendships Feel Hard, Therapy Can Help
Now, back to adult friendship advice…
How to Stay Connected With Friends You Already Have
What about those connections we already have? It’s important not to take those for granted. Relationships need to be nourished in order to flourish and stay strong. Many people have those long-term friendships where, even if you haven’t spoken in months, reconnecting feels like no time has passed at all. That’s incredible and special. But even those friendships take effort and a little extra attention could make those moments of connection happen more often or feel even richer when they do.
Why Adult Friendships Matter More Than You Think
I often think about the importance of friendships, both in my own life and in the lives of my clients. It probably won’t surprise you that making, deepening, and maintaining friendships is a frequent topic of conversation for adults in therapy. Increasingly, I see this come up with men, who may find it especially challenging due to the way they’ve been socialized and their heavy reliance on female partners (for those in heterosexual relationships) to maintain social connections.
Social Connection and Happiness in Adulthood
The importance of adult friendships can’t be overstated. Friends are a powerful source of support, fun, and personal growth, yet we often take them for granted or fail to invest the energy we’d like or need.
Adult Friendship Advice From “Big Friendship”
I recently read Big Friendship: How We Keep Each Other Close by Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman. It’s an incredible read that I highly recommend for anyone considering the value of their closest friendships and wondering whether they’re worth fighting for, and if so, how.
Creating Stronger Connections Takes Effort
The book resonated deeply with me in its discussion of the work that goes into a friendship. Friendships deserve the same effort and care we often reserve for romantic or family relationships. Instead of writing off a friendship or coasting on autopilot, what if we put in the time and energy to truly see and be seen and to have the tough conversations? How rewarding might that be?
Prioritizing Relationships When Life Gets Busy
Because life can overwhelm us, friendships are often the first thing to suffer. In a world where exhaustion feels normal, sometimes even like a badge of honor, how do we make time to stay connected with our most important friends?
📖 If you’d like to read more on slowing down, add this blog post to your reading list 👉 Do Less: Avoid the Trap of Hustle Culture
Practical Ways to Strengthen Your Adult Social Life
Here are a few simple suggestions for prioritizing and nourishing your existing friendships:
1. Schedule time on the calendar
Set up a time to connect and put it on your calendar. If this feels sterile or business-like, challenge that thought and try it anyway. Scheduling in advance makes it more likely you’ll honor that time and plan around it. This could be a phone or video chat and if you’re local, a coffee or happy hour date. Bonus points if you make it a recurring event on the calendar. If that’s not possible, schedule your next meet-up while you’re still together enjoying the current one.
2. Utilize small pockets of time
A meaningful connection doesn’t have to be long. Call a friend on your commute home or while driving to pick up your child. Even a 15-minute chat can provide a valuable touchpoint.
3. Experiment with technology
Plenty of apps can help you stay in touch. Many allow you to send short or long video messages asynchronously. Video memos are a fun alternative to texts, you can hear a friend’s voice, tone, and personality in a way text can’t convey.
Extra tip: If you think of someone you’d like to reach out to, do it right away if possible. Waiting increases the chance you’ll get distracted and forget.
4. Try an organized activity
Chances are you share interests or hobbies with your friends. Find something in your community you both enjoy that can serve as a recurring excuse to spend time together. Join a club sports team, sign up for a class, or attend a lecture series at your local community center.
When Adult Friendships Feel Hard, Therapy Can Help
These are just a few ideas to help you invest in the relationships that matter most. Friendships are vital but can also bring stress or self-doubt. Frustrations, fears of rejection, or feelings of vulnerability can surface and lead to avoidance or withdrawal. If you’re struggling to reconnect or process emotions around your relationships, know that support is available. I’m here to listen and help.
